Freedom Or Family: The Pros And Cons Of Having A Baby – Part 1

I never thought I’d have a baby. It’s not that I didn’t want one. Far from it! It’s just that, when I hit 30, I figured if I hadn’t found anyone special by 30 then the chances would be pretty slim that I’d find someone special enough to have a baby with by 40.

Until I did.

Now that my partner and I have announced our engagement, we’re suddenly the talk of the town. And suddenly many of our friends and family seem to feel it’s quite within their sphere of influence to tell us whether we should have a baby or not.

Pregnant woman sitting on a sofa.

Of course there’s no discussion on whether or not we can have a baby or not – something at age 39 is a pretty important consideration – just lots of commentary on whether we should. Anyone would think that you just wiggle your nose and it just happens like magic. Or perhaps they’re just too polite to go there.

Don’t worry, I’m not about to discuss the ins and outs of the health of my ovaries. The last thing I want is someone sending me health tips! That’s what my doctor’s for – and she’s already annoying enough!

To baby or not to baby, that is the question.

Feet of a family sticking out from the quilt - Family Photo Prints

Firstly, my partner and I have decided to be OK with what ever happens. Yes, we’ll try our hardest, but if it doesn’t happen we’ve made the decision that we’ll be fine. We’ll just go do something else.

But it’s thinking about that ‘something else’ that’s doing our heads in.

Couple on a tropical beach at Maldives - Family Photo Prints

So we’re looking to formulate a list of pros and cons and I’m looking for help from you all – parents and non-parents! Here’s a few pros and cons to get the ball rolling. You will notice I have more cons at this stage. Oops. Help!

Next week I’ll follow up with a full and complete list based on your responses.


1. We will get to share our childish wonder with, well, a child. My partner – who’s a puppeteer – can entertain the child with puppets and put to good use his massive collection of cartoon DVDs while I can sing, paint and read to my heart’s content (without judgement).
2. We’ll have someone to visit, care for and love us when we’re old.
3. ….
4. ….
5. ….


1. It will be harder to travel overseas for long periods of time because the child will need to be in school.
2. Kids are expensive so we wouldn’t be able to have as many nice things anymore.
3. There will be less time to enjoy each other’s company – and we love each other’s company.
4. It will hurt. A lot.
5. We’re too old. When our child starts school, all the kids (and parents) will poke fun at our grey hairs.
6. ….

There are definitely more cons, so I better stop there and let you have a go with both the pros and the cons. Comment below now…


There are 3 comments for this article
  1. Pingback: According To Facebook: The Pros And Cons Of Having A Baby
  2. Neesy at Feb 16, 2015

    – it’s exhausting.
    – two words: sleep deprivation.
    – they grow really quickly (which is a pro as well right?)
    – news stories about children feel very close to home – the good news and the bad.
    – the mummy wars sucks. a lot.
    – poonamis.

    – your own in-house zen master every single day.
    – watching the growth and development of a human being’s brain is amazing.
    – a slower life, enjoying the little things, like a piece of grass or watching a butterfly.
    – if you weren’t before, you become closer to your family members.
    – you become closer to your partner (hopefully).
    you have a whole new bunch of friends who also have the same anxieties about child rearing that you do.
    – you increase your knowledge of nursery rhymes, schools nearby and non-toxic toys.

    • Eli Jenkins at Feb 19, 2015

      That’s terrific Neesy, thanks!

      How fun are kid’s nursery rhymes! Good luck on your exhausting, but zen journey.

      Eli. 🙂